Heartbroken

I've been dreading writing this post because by writing it...it is real and it's unfortunately our reality.  We are in Florida again.  We've been here almost a week, the boys are in heaven swimming in Grandpa and Grandma's pool multiple times a day, taking trips to the ocean to play with cousins, collecting sea shells and chasing birds.  They are soaking up the warmth of the sun and ocean (while it's cold and rainy/snowy back home), laughing and playing with no worries in the world...unfortunately we are here because Jose is sick...really sick.  (which is hard to even write) 

The boys understand he's sick but they have no idea how sick, although I think they are starting to grasp it.  Dylan is full of questions about everything, and while I was running the past two mornings he must have gotten bored because the questions started flowing. Dylan: "What is Grandpa sick with?"me: "He has a disease called cancer and it makes his tummy hurt so he takes  medicine(chemo) to try to make him feel better." Dylan: "Can the doctor's make him feel better?" me: "probably not" Dylan: "But Mommy, what if we catch this cancer and get sick too?" poor thing...I reassured him that we could not catch his cancer and that we need to love on Grandpa as much as possible while we are here. 

This entire situation is heart breaking, it's emotional, it's absolutely shocking because it has been so quick but most of all it makes you reflect upon the blessings that are in my life.  Jose (and Kim) have been absolutely amazing since the moment I met them 8 years ago.  Jose has been so generous, so loving (especially to the grand kids), so supportive, it's hard to imagine this life without him. We are trying to enjoy every moment down here because that's what makes Jose happy but I am heartbroken.  Heartbroken for Jose, for Kim, for Jose's kids, for Luke...everyone who loves him.  

I am attempting to keep life as "normal" as possible here, so we are still having some fun.  We headed to the beach on a couple outings. 

 Will refused to wear a life jacket so he didn't get to "swim" in the ocean :)

The boys LOVE Grandpa and Grandma's pool. We swim at least twice a day down here. Tonight I think their swim was over 2 hours long.  The best part is we opened the blinds today so Jose can watch the boys from his bedroom, swimming in his pool and having fun.

 Lauren turned 9 months yesterday, so I attempted a few 9 month photos while we had beautiful weather!

 He got a little too comfortable (for my liking) today in the ocean.

 And of course...ice cream on the pier.  Life is too short to not enjoy it! :)

 My precious babies.  I just saw this quote on facebook and thought it was the perfect quote to end this post with:

Life is too ironic to fully understand. It takes sadness to know what happiness is. 

Noise to appreciate silence & absence to value presence.